12 new life lessons from Tina Fey
You know what's not terrible? Spending your breakfast hour with Tina Fey (and her faithful presenter, Jon Hamm). On Wednesday morning, Fey was honored at THR's annual Women in Entertainment affair, which celebrates powerful women in Hollywood. As guests politely ate their vegetarian/vegan frittatas, Liz Lemon delivered life lessons for a solid 18 minutes. Here are our 12 Favorite Fey takeaways.
1. How to address Hollywood when you don't live there
"It's an honor" to be at the Hollywood breakfast, the New Yorker began, "where the thigh gap meets the pay gap!"
2. And the elephant you spotted in the room on your way in
"It's not all ladies here. Brett Ratner is here. In his defense, he thought this was a thing where you could eat breakfast off of 100 women. Honest mistake."
3. Don't forget to remember your roots
"Being in this beautiful room is like something that I would have poured over a picture of in InStyle magazine 20 years ago, living in Chicago standing in a Walgreens. And then I would have put the InStyle back and I would have used that money to buy pudding."
4. And history
"Why are you Trumping me?" asked Fey, when Hamm crept up behind her at the podium.
5. Be kind to those who also flew in that day
"Megyn (Kelly) and I don't know each other but we did once take the same plane to Disney World with our children. So I feel like we've served in the Marines together."
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6. Burn Ryan Murphy
"And Ryan Murphy, the prolific genius who has created so many wonderful opportunities for actresses of a certain age – to play witches and horrifying monsters and lawyers who fail to convict." (Pause) "I'm just kidding," she said, promptly name-checking her agent and availability.
7. Burn Jon Hamm
"Showing up to an event like this, Jon is literally putting himself in danger," she noted, before presenting this anecdote: "Jon and I hadn't known each other long in 2009 when he kindly agreed to come to Washington D.C. to help present me the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor ... My whole family was there. It was as a very special night.
At the party afterwards my cousin came up to me and said, 'I just met Jon Hamm! And he is so handsome! But I have to say I kind of like it better when he's dressed like Don Draper.' I said: 'Yeah, he actually doesn't do it for me at all. I really like John Slattery, he's more my deal.' At which point I heard a little voice over my shoulder say "I can (expletive) hear you." And it was Jon!" (Laughter) "And yet, here he is! Giving me another award!"
8. Be explicit about why you don't want to talk about Trump
"When I get written up in Breitbart it's because I want them to be mad that I'm making an all-female Hitler biopic."
9. Explain why Hillary lost
"I have to say, I think the real reason that Hillary lost — and it’s the thing that people are afraid to talk about: Not enough celebrity music videos urging people to vote,” she said. “I just think if there had been, like, one more funny rap, or like, another Hamilton parody, or something. Just like a little more hustle from Liz Banks and we could’ve taken Michigan.”
10. Relate
"I'm not immune to the pressure to try to look better," said Fey, adding that she recently asked her aesthetician for an honest review of a new skin-tightening treatment. "It sort of feels like you're being stabbed and electrocuted at the same time," Fey recalled the woman telling her. "And the moral of the story is, I'm still considering it, guys. That's what it's like to be a woman in Hollywood."
11. Share #LongtermGoals
"I would like to work less, I'm not going to lie to you. My dream is to work three 12-hour days in the middle of the week and receive an award every six months."
12: And rattle off your best advice for Millennials
"Don't smoke; wear a bra; trust your instincts; don't (sleep with) John Mayer."