Ray Rice says he's 'rehabilitated man,' eyes NFL return

A contrite, reflective and hopeful Ray Rice appeared on ESPN’s SportsCenter on Tuesday evening, clearly hopeful his NFL future isn’t over but seemingly at least equally concerned about changing the narrative in the wake of the infamous domestic violence incident that has come to define him.

“I’m not afraid to say right now I'm a rehabilitated man,” Rice said in a one-on-one interview with Jemele Hill. “Some people will probably never forgive my actions but I think … over time I want to be able to rewrite the script."

It’s been 18 months since Rice was caught on videotape dragging the inert body of his then-fiancee, Janay, from an Atlantic City casino elevator after slugging her. The Baltimore Ravens cut the previously beloved running back last September after the video surfaced. Rice was initially scheduled to serve a two-game suspension last season, but he never played for the Ravens after the incident and hasn’t been picked up by any of the other 31 NFL teams since.

Rice took accountability for his actions and continued to express concern about his daughter will perceive him. He’s undergone counseling and is now speaking out against domestic violence.

“There’s no room for it in society,” Rice said.

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His biggest regret?

"I did everything wrong at that moment. I was out of my mind not to help her up,” said Rice, who said seeing the video was a personal low point of this entire saga. “To treat her like nothing was the worst thing I could have ever done."

Rice even admitted pondering suicide in the intervening months.

"I actually felt what it felt like for people to feel like it wasn't worth living. I felt like that at one point,” he said. “I know what it felt like to not want to live anymore."

But Rice wants to live now. And he wants to resume his once-promising NFL career, which hit an on-field nadir as he battled a hip injury throughout a disappointing 2013 season when he rushed for just 660 yards.

“I have a lot of hope and faith that I'll be able to hang ‘em up the right way. That’s what’s keeping me going, keeping me working,” the three-time Pro Bowler and 2012 Super Bowl champion said of his future, knowing full well most teams won’t be inclined to roll the dice on a 28-year-old who’s been radioactive from a public relations standpoint for nearly a year.

"I always preach, one or two bad decisions, your dream can become a nightmare,” said Rice. “Well, I had to eat my own words. I truly lived a nightmare. I’m just really hopeful for a second chance.”

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Follow Nate Davis on Twitter @ByNateDavis

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