Lawrence Phillips' letters reveal another side of troubled player
BAKERSFIELD, Calif. – The letter from Lawrence Phillips arrived Friday, the same day a coroner ruled the former football star’s death early Wednesday was a suicide.
The return address was Kern County (Calif.) State Prison, where Phillips, 40, was serving a 31-year sentence and facing murder charges in the death of his cellmate. The letter was addressed to Tony Lidgett, a criminal defense attorney in Bakersfield. It was dated Jan. 7, the day Phillips mouthed across a courtroom to Lidgett that Phillips was staying with his attorney.
“Please allow me to apologize for wasting your time,” the letter from Phillips began.
Lawrence Phillips had 'big heart' says ex-girlfriend he assaulted
Phillips was searching for new legal representation when he met with Lidgett several days before the Jan 7 hearing. On Tuesday, about a week after that meeting, Phillips again appeared in court, this time to hear a judge declare there was enough evidence to try him for murder. About 12 hours later, Phillips was dead.
NFL STATS CENTRAL: The latest NFL scores, schedules, odds, stats and more.
The letter to Lidgett solved a smaller mystery. Phillips had discovered he couldn’t secure money soon enough to provide the attorney’s retainer, he explained.
“I am hopeful that this waste of your time was not too much of an inconvenience,” Phillips wrote. “I am extremely thankful that you took the time out of your schedule to visit the prison and attend the courtroom today. Thank you.”
What struck Lidgett about the letter is what Phillips’ closest supporters said they have known for years: Even though he committed horrific crimes — assaulting three women, driving into a group of teenagers and allegedly murdering his cellmate — he was far more than a felon. He was an enigma.
They cite their own letters, written by the former running back who starred at the University of Nebraska when the Cornhuskers won the 1994 and 1995 national championships and who played three seasons in the NFL before behavioral issues and legal trouble derailed his professional career.
There are dozens, if not hundreds, of letters that Phillips wrote during his incarceration over the last decade. Many include details of prison life such as stashed weapons, stabbings and murder. But the letters, said the recipients who shared them with USA TODAY Sports, also revealed Phillips’ humanity.
The terrifying prison letters from ex-Nebraska star Lawrence Phillips
Phillips expressed gratitude for care packages, passed along birthday wishes, lamented news about a former teammate having marital problems and recognized milestones — such as when he learned the daughter of Ty Pagone, vice principal at Baldwin Park High School in Southern California when Phillips was a star running back, was pregnant.
“That is great news!” Phillips wrote in a letter dated Oct. 30, 2014. “I’m sure you all can not wait for the baby to arrive. …
“It should be about time for (her) to get some well deserved time off, huh? Tell her to enjoy. I’m sure she knows she will not have much time off for the next 25 years.”
‘He stood up for kids’
Phillips, who spent much of his childhood living in group homes, grew close with Pagone and his family. It was at Pagone’s home where Nebraska coach Tom Osborne made his home visit with Phillips before he decided to play for the ’Huskers. And a few times, Pagone said, he brought Phillips over to help with yardwork and then served a meal.
“A little lazy doing yardwork,” Pagone said of Phillips with a laugh. “But he was great with the kids. They liked him a lot. …
“I know if Lawrence felt slighted somehow, it would make him angry. But as a football player and just a student on campus, he never acted up.
“I remember in one particular game, he got knocked out of bounds and another guy hit him and he just got up clapping and went back to the huddle. You see in the NFL today where everybody is pushing and shoving and all that stuff. He just got up clapping and went back to the huddle. That’s how we saw him and that’s how we knew him.”
Tony Zane, Phillips’ former high school coach, received scores of letters. In one dated Sept. 2, 2014, Phillips took pleasure in learning that James Heggins, a former high school teammate, was taking over as head coach at the school where they starred.
“I’m glad to hear Heggins is back on the scene at BP,” Phillips wrote. “Hopefully he can get them back on track. I heard about the beautiful facilities they have now. Now they got to win some games and championships.”
At Baldwin Park, Zane said, Phillips distinguished himself off the field, too.
“It was a little bit of a gang-banging school at the time,” Zane said. “He stood up for kids that were getting picked on. It was nice to see.
“Senior year I used to pick him up to get him to a class at 7 in the morning that he needed to graduate. He was so appreciative, though a couple of times I’d honk the horn and I had to knock on the window and he said, ‘I don’t feel good.’ I said, ‘Yeah, I know you don’t feel good, but you need to pass that class.’
Lawrence Phillips' family agrees to donate brain for CTE study
“When he got there, he was always good. Everything was good. Teachers liked him. Everybody liked him. If you knew him, you liked him.”
Dozens of letters were sent to George Darlington, the former Nebraska assistant coach who was in charge of Phillips’ recruitment. Phillips closely followed the ’Huskers.
In a letter dated May 2, 2014, Phillips wrote, “I hear the ’Husker spring practices are a little more spirited. That is a plus. I do not think teams will ever practice how we practiced. Game has become too soft. I guess guys will have longer careers? Maybe if a team ever does come back to that mentality they will crush the college cranks.”
He later offered his thoughts on the tenuous job status of former Nebraska coach Bo Pelini after the school had decided to keep Pelini for another season.
“I was also surprised about the non-firing of Pelini,” Phillips wrote. “Apparently he has the blessing of Coach Osborne, which of course goes a long way.”
What was behind violence?
It was Osborne who suspended Phillips in 1995 after Phillips assaulted a former girlfriend — Kate McKewn, then a basketball player at Nebraska — throwing her down three flights of stairs. It also was Osborne who in the face of criticism reinstated Phillips before the national title game in which Phillips rushed for 165 yards and two touchdowns while helping lead Nebraska to a 62-24 victory against Florida.
“I felt the only thing I could put in place that would keep him on track was football, because that was probably the only consistent organizing factor in his life,” Osborne told USA TODAY Sports, noting that Phillips was required to get counseling as a condition of rejoining the team.
“When he was in the NFL, I told his agent he absolutely needed to stay in counseling,” Osborne added. “As I recall, the agent said that would happen. But I’m pretty sure it didn’t.”
Two decades after leaving Nebraska, Phillips became the third player on Nebraska’s championship teams to be charged with murder. He was identified as a suspect in the death of his cellmate in April after correctional officers found the unresponsive body of Damien Soward, a former gang member serving 82 years for murder.
Former teammate Christian Peter on Lawrence Phillips: 'I think there were some demons'
“There’s no question that he made some mistakes in his life and some things that are regrettable,” Osborne said of Phillips. “But he was talented, not just athletically but intellectually.”
Jesse Whitten, the lead attorney who was representing Phillips in the murder case in Kern County, also said he was struck by Phillips’ intelligence. Recalling his trips to the prison where Whitten estimated they met about eight times for as many as 40 total hours, Whitten said, “I’d be driving out to the prison thinking of legal strategy and what we’re going to do. A lot of times I’d sit down and he’d beat me to the punch.
“I would say, ‘Here’s where we’re at in the case.’ And he would say, ‘This is what I think we should do.’ And I’m like, ‘Look, that’s just what I was about to tell you.’ ”
In what likely was among Phillips’ final letters, he wrote to Lidgett, another criminal defense attorney in Bakersfield. He told Lidgett he was “dissatisfied” with his legal representation led by Whitten and wanted to talk to Lidgett about taking over the case.
“As far as compensation, there will be absolutely delays,” wrote Phillips, who intended to pay attorney fees with money he anticipated getting from the NFL concussion settlement. “If you are interested, Mr. Lidgett, please come out to the prison.”
And so Lidgett did go to Kern Valley State Prison, and Lidgett said he and Phillips developed a rapport even though they’d met for only 90 minutes.
“There was just something about him that clicked,” Lidgett said. “We laughed. We talked about sports for a certain amount of time. He was articulate; he was charismatic.
“You could tell he had street smarts, but he’s a college-educated guy. It was an easy conversation. Something just flowed.”
Then Jan. 8, Lidgett got the second letter from Phillips explaining why he would not be able to retain him before a probable cause hearing on Tuesday, when a judge ordered Phillips to be tried. The next day, Phillips was dead.
The death left Lidgett among those speculating about what might have happened.
Did Phillips grow depressed and pessimistic about the murder case in which he faced the possible death penalty?
Will an examination of Phillips’ brain — which has been donated to medical researchers at Boston University — reveal Phillips had chronic traumatic encephalopathy (CTE), the result of repetitive brain trauma from football that might have contributed to his violent and suicidal behavior?
Did a tough childhood in which Phillips grew up fatherless and spent time on the streets and several years in group homes ultimately derail his life?
“I would love to figure it out,” said Lidgett, who later added, “He was considerate to write a letter.”
GALLERY: LAWRENCE PHILLIPS THROUGH THE YEARS
