When love first blooms, fun matters more than money, but that changes

When a love affair is first budding, Americans are more interested in fun than what’s in their partner’s  bank account, according to a new survey.

In a poll commissioned by Discover, the direct banking and payment services company, 40% of respondents said that fun and entertainment was their top requirement at the start of a relationship.  A physical spark was most important to 29% of those questioned, while financial stability was the most critical  factor for just 19%.

But the more serious a relationship gets, the more money matters. Among those who were currently dating, 59% said their partner’s financial stability was “very” or “extremely” important, and 82% of those who were officially planning a trip down the aisle said it was critical that their betrothed be on solid ground financially.

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"When people are dating, or just starting a relationship, the focus should be about the fun and excitement of something new,''  said Julie Loeger, Discover's senior vice president and chief marketing officer, in an email. "I'd be surprised if the words 'credit score' or 'financial health' are ever used on a first date. But as a relationship progresses, and a couple starts looking to rent an apartment, buy a home or secure any type of loan, the importance of having a good credit score and being financially healthy becomes a major priority."

Still, some splurges are allowed — or even expected, despite what many people say. The survey found that among the 75% of respondents who told their partner not to worry about buying a present for Valentine’s Day, 47% still would welcome one.

Those baubles and chocolates can add up. A separate study by Bankrate.com found that on average, a typical Valentine's Day will have a price tag of $512.02.  That’s based on the average cost of items like a box of chocolates, a dozen roses and a romantic dinner for two.

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Engaged couples chat more about money than those who have not yet made the decision to marry, with 44%  of engaged respondents in the Discover survey saying they talk with their partner about finances at least once a week, vs. the 11% of respondents who are merely dating and did the same.

The poll questioned 2,023 consumers between Jan. 19 and 22.