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Summer is so bad here that cops 'arrest' weathermen

Matthew Diebel
USA TODAY
Kind of dreary: Newfoundland is a lovely place, but this summer has been plagued with rain, drizzle and fog, known by locals as RDF.

It gives a whole new meaning to the concept of an Amber Alert.

Fed-up police in the Canada's Newfoundland and Labrador have become so desperate about the lack of good weather in recent weeks that they have issued a plea to locate the missing season.

Yes, the hunt is on for summer -- that period of hot weather fueled by that bright, amber-colored orb otherwise known as the sun.

"SUMMER was last seen in early August of 2014," said a pitiful press release from the Royal Newfoundland Constabulary (RNC). "When last seen, SUMMER was described as being between 20-30 degrees Celsius (68-86 degrees Fahrenheit), blue skies with a bright and warm source of light in the sky. There have been sporadic sightings of this bright object, but these sightings have been rare since May 2015."

Local meteorologist Ryan Snoddon of the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation (CBC) even launched a competition asking residents to come up with a new name for July, explaining on his blog that it has been the worst summer in more than 20 years.

"This July is not only shaping up to be the coldest since 1993 ..., it will very likely end an amazing run of 21 straight years where the average July high was 20° or warmer. That stat is even more impressive when you look back between 1942-1993 and find that the previous longest trend of 20° or warmer, was just four years in row!"

But Snoddon's weather-geeky excitement cannot hide the fact that he and fellow prognosticator Eddie Sheerr of NTV are taking much of the blame for the lousy conditions. In late June, Snoddon predicted sunny weather for July, a month that, so far, has delivered a diet of rain, drizzle and fog (RDF, to locals) in the province, which is situated in the far east of the country.

An RNC officer even came by the CBC and NTV stations in the provincial capital, St. John's, to take the woeful weathermen into custody.

Said police spokesman Constable Steven Curnew, tongue somewhat in cheek, after he arrested Snoddon: "He's being charged with impersonating a meteorologist, failing to provide the essentials of summer – that being sunshine, good forecasts and blue skies – and we also have him on trafficking of RDF."

And at NTV, Curnew had similar comments about Sheerr, adding, however, that the consequences could be more dire. "With Eddie being from the United States," he warned, "he could possibly be facing deportation. Unfortunately, due to the weather, it could be two weeks before we could get a flight out of St. John's Airport."

The press release gave more details on the sweeping investigation taking place.

"The RNC are taking this matter very seriously," it read. "An investigative team has been assembled. The chief of Police, William Janes, has also taken an active role in this file and it travelling abroad in an effort to locate SUMMER. Officers are looking to speak with two individuals who are persons of interest in this case. These individuals have been identified as 30 year old Eddie SHEERR and 32 year old Ryan SNODDON. Success in locating these individuals have been significantly hampered by Summer's main enemies RAIN, DRIZZLE and FOG. …

"Anyone who has any information pertaining to the whereabouts of SUMMER is asked to contact the RNC at 729-8000 or Crime Stoppers at 1-800-222-TIPS (8477)."

Krissy Holmes, a CBC reporter who is subbing for Snoddon – whose wife gave birth to their first child just an hour or so after his arrest – told USA TODAY that this summer has been particularly drab.

"We're not exactly known for our good weather," she said, "but it's usually better than this. Ideal highs are in the mid-20s (about 75 Fahrenheit). Normally the sun comes out more."

Newfoundlanders crave their short summer because the winter is long, damp and frigid. "St. John's is the foggiest city in the world," said Holmes, who is a native of the province.

"Air temperatures in January and February are usually about minus 6 or 7 (about 18 Fahrenheit)," said Constable Curnew. "But it feels much colder because our air is so damp."

URGENT UPDATE! It appears that Newfoundland's misery may be coming to an end. At about 11 a.m. ET Thursday, Sheerr tweeted that the sun had come out and that temperatures were beginning to climb.

However, Constable Curnew told USA TODAY at noon that the break in the weather could well be short-lived. "It's partly cloudy right now," he said, adding that local wags on social media had attributed the improved conditions to the detentions of Snoddon and Sheerr.

"They're saying that the fact that we locked up the meteorologists led to the more moderate weather," Curnew said.

"It's now 18 degrees Celsius (64 Fahrenheit)," he added somewhat excitedly.

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